


Cracks

by thisfrailheart



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Kinda sad too, M/M, a look at their lives during the First Wizarding War, but most definitely wolfstar, nothing graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-09
Updated: 2018-06-09
Packaged: 2019-05-20 04:34:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14887733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisfrailheart/pseuds/thisfrailheart
Summary: Something that was inspired by Apocalyptica's song Broken Pieces (feat. Lacey).Beta'd by the brilliant Nicki.





	Cracks

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ForeverShippingJohnlock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForeverShippingJohnlock/gifts).



> Something that was inspired by Apocalyptica's song Broken Pieces (feat. Lacey). 
> 
> Beta'd by the brilliant Nicki.

Another bad day. _Again_. They just keep on coming. The bad days. And the Death Eaters. We keep losing people. And hope, I think. Pretty sure nobody thought this was what we were getting ourselves into. And now the cupboards in the kitchen are stocked with more healing potions than food and the cozy lamps in the living room have been replaced by cold, clinical lights and the happiness has turned to ash in our hands.

The four of us, we… We used to talk about everything. We’d speculate about the future. And when Marlene and Dorcas would finally… I shake my head, trying to not think about the fact that they’re both gone. I wish we were still able to joke like we used to, the four of us. But Peter is in a constant state of sadness these days…understandably so. And James isn’t even here. He has a family to protect. And then there’s…him. He lives here, still. He lives here with me, still. We live here together, still. _And yet…_

I feel the wards shift around me and as he steps through the door I realize I’ve been staring at the same newspaper article for way too long without even reading it. I fold the paper and lean back in my chair. He comes up behind me and kisses my cheek. His lips are cold.

I want to ask him where he’s been. But I don’t want him to ask me where I’ve been, so I don’t say anything. I feel like the earth is being torn open at our feet. He asks if I’ve eaten today. My throat is dry. Am I even breathing, I wonder. He asks again, using my name this time. I think that maybe it’s not the earth being torn open. I think it’s my chest.

I turn around to face him. I want to say all of these things to him. I look at him and understand that I don’t have to. He looks at me and I look at him and I think he looks like he can’t breathe either.

I get up and he reaches out for me and I reach out for him. We hold each other so close I imagine the cracks in my chest might be mended after a while. I think we might not have a while and he says my name and the cracks grow bigger.

The secrets we keep were supposed to protect us. Our family. Our hearts.

Never did we think for a second they might break us apart. Our family. Our hearts.

I think about leaving. I think about leaving him. He kisses my forehead. I think there might come a time when I can’t make the decision to leave anymore. He kisses my lips. I’m sure that time has come and gone already.

I kiss him. He sighs. We both know where this is going. Where it’s always going. We both know it’s a bad idea. But those, just like the bad days, keep on coming. I kiss him again. I feel his hands under my shirt. Soon I feel them on my naked skin.

“It’s going to be alright,” he says later. He’s holding my hand. I want him to let go. I want to get up off the cold floor. I turn my head and look at him instead.

“No, it’s not,” I say and look up into the blinding lights above us. The brightness is supposed to help us see when healing wounds. I think it’s really good at casting shadows. I look back at him. He’s looking at me too. We both know it’s the truth. We both choose to ignore it.

 

He holds my hand a little tighter. I let him.

**Author's Note:**

> So...who did YOU think was telling the story?


End file.
